I Could Live There: Montage Take Me Away

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I’m so sleep-deprived that I think $10.95M—the highest price ever paid for a Beverly Hills condo—sounds totally fair to live in the actual lap of luxury.  

Condos at the top of a hotel in Los Angeles are only appealing to me when I’m sitting at my desk at 9 pm, on deadline and straining to make out what the copy editor scribbled in the margins of  my “final” layouts. That’s about the only time I’ll do a search for ‘luxury spa residence,’ and think to myself, upon seeing photos of terribly styled candlelit treatment rooms, “I want to go there.” It’s essentially “overworked editor porn” and this might be the jackpot; it’s about as cheesy as it gets (bowls of multi-colored mud laid out on an onyx altar!) and yet… I yearn to be this demure beauty awaiting her smocked massage therapist: 

All it takes to be her is the purchase of a $7.7M 3-bedroom condo at the Montage Residences in Beverly Hills, located on one of the top floors of this five-star, LEED Gold-certifed hotel that opened in November 2008:

Which, if you ask me, is a small price to pay for more uniformed attendants by this pool: 

And some friendly valets when i arrive nightly after a long workday at my porte cochere: 

And though I’m not usually such of fan of cornucopias of pillows (not to mention the dreadful styling), tonight I am salivating at what must be three yards of flange alone: 

And in case, you’ve forgotten that these fantasies are taken from a five-star hotel, here’s a little reminder… that’s right, there are a selection of restaurants just downstairs, fully staffed with an army of men in white uniforms: 

I’m not of my right mind but I’m thinking this is a fantasy lifestyle that would last forever and I no longer find it shocking that someone paid $11M to live here. It’s my current dream come true—as priceless as the ability to teleport myself into my bed right this minute. 

 

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